Buffy/Angel or Buffy/Spike? How about both?

gillianmorsee

gillianmorsee

Slayer
Joined
Apr 16, 2016
Messages
38
Age
28
In my opinion, I like both Buffy/Angel and Buffy/Spike. I think that Buffy was a very different person when she was with Angel than when she was with Spike, which is why at those very different times in her life, she needed very different kinds of love to deal with the particular problems she was facing. In Season 6, Buffy needed a type of love that was fiery and passionate, in order to help her feel again. In Season 2, Buffy needed the type of love that was caring and tender in order to help her escape her problems. I wouldn't like Season 2 Buffy with Spike because that's not what she needed at the time, just as I would not like Season 6 Buffy with Angel because he could also not give her what she needed at that point in her life.
What do you guys think?
 
Buffy Summers
Buffy Summers
Well put :)
What did Spike give Buffy in season 6? He only further isolated her from her friends/family and helped fuel her spiral into self-hate. He was definitely not what she needed in her depressed season 6 state.
 
NeonNightLight said:
What did Spike give Buffy in season 6? He only further isolated her from her friends/family and spiral into self-hate. He was definitely not what she needed in her depressed season 6 state.
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I agree that Spike was extremely emotionally abusive to Buffy during Season 6, but I don't think he was the reason she was isolated from her friends and family. Mostly, her friends were caught up in their own problems and they didn't notice Buffy, and I don't think Spike was the cause of that. I think he helped her to feel again when she was feeling completely dead, even though the feelings she was having were not very good. In other words, even though Spike made her feel horrible sometimes, at least she was feeling something at all other than dead. I'm not saying that Spike and Buffy's relationship in Season 6 was healthy, but I think it helped Buffy become stronger, because she finally was strong enough near the end to end things with him. She had finally begun to feel good enough by herself that she didn't need Spike anymore to help her feel.
 
I agree. Angel was a great "first love/teen crush" but he wasn't the long haul guy. I don't think Spike was abusive to Buffy in S6. He did everything in his power to try and have a relationship with her but he was a souless vampire and she was a messed up human so mistakes were made on both parts. I'm so glad they were able to forgive each other and move on in a healthier way once Spike got a soul and Buffy got over being dead. They are great together. They raise each other up and make each other better people.
 
I'm going with both.

There is an issue with Buffy being mortal, and aging, and Vamps being ageless and not as mortal. There are different issues they will need to address, and different ways they mature and change. I don't think that can be ignored when it comes to her relationships.

She very strongly believed she had an expiration date when she was young and with Angel, and at the end of S7 I think she's pretty confident that she does not. That is a HUGE change, on top of all the other crap she dealt with. She rewrote her job description as the Slayer.

Spike is still adjusting to his soul, she is adjusting to her new role.

I don't think the WRH Angel and Buffy have much in common anymore. Their ship has sailed. She and Spike are both still on paths of major self discovery and adjusting to completely new outlooks and possibilities for their future.

Personally, I would have loved S2 Spuffy because I am twisted and perverse, and heck, if she was going to be with a vamp...why not be with the ultimate bad boy? But realistically it's good it didn't happen except in my mind while I'm mowing the lawn and doing dishes.
 
GoSpuffy
GoSpuffy
[No message]
NeonNightLight said:
What did Spike give Buffy in season 6? He only further isolated her from her friends/family and helped fuel her spiral into self-hate. He was definitely not what she needed in her depressed season 6 state.
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(Happen to be rewatching Season 6 lol)

In early season 6, Spike does provide a "no judgment zone" where Buffy can be herself and doesn't have to act like everything is okay.
 
GoSpuffy said:
I agree. Angel was a great "first love/teen crush" but he wasn't the long haul guy. I don't think Spike was abusive to Buffy in S6. He did everything in his power to try and have a relationship with her but he was a souless vampire and she was a messed up human so mistakes were made on both parts. I'm so glad they were able to forgive each other and move on in a healthier way once Spike got a soul and Buffy got over being dead. They are great together. They raise each other up and make each other better people.
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I think there was a bit of abuse coming from both ends in Season 6 - Buffy abused Spike physically and he abused her emotionally. I'm glad that in Season 7 Spike and Buffy's relationship was much healthier (as Spike had a soul and Buffy was happier), like you said. I love the way their dynamic changed in Season 7 and that they overcame Season 6's problems.
 
GoSpuffy
GoSpuffy
[No message]
Buffy Summers said:
(Happen to be rewatching Season 6 lol)

In early season 6, Spike does provide a "no judgment zone" where Buffy can be herself and doesn't have to act like everything is okay.
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This is true, but unfortunately lasts for a brief time before their abusive relationship takes hold for the rest of season 6, in which Spike does judge her.
 
cryptwarmer
cryptwarmer
Forever is a long time. I don't think either of them should stay with anyone that long. I would think the fun of sorta immortality would be getting together with lots of different partners
GoSpuffy said:
I'm with that, and Spike and Angel can spend the rest of time together after Buffy dies of old age. @bespangeled
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That's my plan!😀

I think Buffy was the one who changed both of them immeasurably, what ever difficulties she faced. Season two Angel who killed Jenny, season 6 Spike who tried to rape her - and by the time she was away from them they were both souled and seeking to change the world. Both relationships had awesome story telling - full of layers of conflict.

Personally, I think high maintenance vamps are...well, high maintenance. If I were Buffy I might try for someone less difficult - a vacation from angst.
 
bespangeled said:
That's my plan!😀

I think Buffy was the one who changed both of them immeasurably, what ever difficulties she faced. Season two Angel who killed Jenny, season 6 Spike who tried to rape her - and by the time she was away from them they were both souled and seeking to change the world. Both relationships had awesome story telling - full of layers of conflict.

Personally, I think high maintenance vamps are...well, high maintenance. If I were Buffy I might try for someone less difficult - a vacation from angst.
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Buffy is an angst magnet, she thrives on it.
 
I think that we all miss the basic concept of Buffy being in a relationship. I do agree on all fronts that Season 2 Buffy is different from Season 6 and 7. Not taking into consideration what happens in the comics. During the entire 7 seasons we come to realize that Buffy is not meant to have anyone in her life during that period of time.
She does fall in love with both Angel and Spike. Both were the correct match for her in that specific time. But at the end of the day Buffy was simply not ready to be in a relationship. Not a serious one anyway.
Her season 7 cookie metaphor puts everything in perspective. It is just not the right time.

Still I support Buffy/Angel vs Buffy/Spike all the way. Most Spuffy fans support an unilateral relationship. They find Spike's un-corresponded love just fantastic. Someone going above and beyond for the person they love. I personally find that offensive and demeaning on a fine complex character as Spike. No one deserves to beg for love. No one should be put in that position. In season 5 Buffy is very clear with Spike and he continues to love and love and love without receiving anything. In season 6 Buffy takes advantage of Spike's passion during the course of the season until she realizes that it's wrong.

Putting the Spuffy relationship into a real life context is the friendzone syndrome. A guy is after a girl for so long that in the end the girl just shrugs and says... "Why not give the guy a shot?" Spike is better than that. Buffy is better than that as well.

I believe that when everything is aligned, both elements in a relationship love equally. Spuffy doesn't offer that once in 3 seasons. In three season we only see Spike being friend zoned time and time again. At the end Buffy says She loves Spike but even Spike says it's BS.

Bangel as short lived as the relationship was, did offer mutual love. Both elements of the relationship loved to the same extent. Seeing the relationship completely fulfilled in I will Remember You is proof of this. Taking the curse out of the equation Buffy and Angel are true soul mates. Soulmates unfortunately destined to be forever apart.

Spike, Buffy and Angel are all strong characters. And I believe that because of their own character gravitas, they simply clash with each other.
 
cryptwarmer
cryptwarmer
wow...love this! lots to chew on. great post
How about neither?

The both had their time at certain points in Buffy's life and now their devoid of all dramatic potential.
Try something/someone new- for ALL of them. 🙂
 
thetopher said:
How about neither?
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Buffy is a complex character. Just as relationships are. Buffy's relationships are not doomed to fail. Their purpose is to make her grow as a character. Even thought we root for B/A or S/B, Buffy is not meant to stay with neither. Although she hints in season 7 who she would love to spend her life with in the future. The relationships are purposely created to make Buffy grow as the heroine we all know and love
 
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