I honestly don't know if it's a flaw or a trait, but I am wary of experts. It comes to mind as I've had two incidents this very week that goes into it.
One, a heater began squeaking. My partner put in a call (a long wait) but I was sure a repairman would try to scam us for parts he'd insist were necessary but just free money into his own pocket, possibly even willing to sabotage our other heaters to make it happen (I have known a repairman to sabotage a fridge to try to sell us a new one, but I busted him and got rid of him). Basically, it would end up being hundreds of dollars that we can't afford.
So just a couple of days ago I dismantled the squeaking heater, took out the motor and scrubbed it down with 3 in 1 oil. And, so far, it has worked beautifully. While I was at it I took part other heaters to clean them out. And I feel very relieved, feeling I averted our being harmed by a professional, and glad when she called to cancel the appointment with the repairman.
Also this week I saw a doctor who did not inspire confidence. It was for two things, chronic insomnia that is getting worse (and I believe is genetic, inherited from both sides of the family, and not much to be done about it) and a couple of hours or so when I started shaking severely, too much to function (the last straw against my seeing a doctor), though it has only happened once.
My partner insisted and arranged for me to see a doctor, but I saw the doctor as trying to get me on meds and into normal doctor appointments (and what happened only strengthened that sentiment, I was not impressed with her). After all, I'm sure she has college loans to pay off in addition to whatever pressure the clinic itself puts on her to make for repeat business. The only good thing was the blood tests, which everything turned out fine (I was able to call in a couple of days later to get results).
The above two examples are very recent, this week, so it's in mind. It is rooted in anxiety, even if I have actual experience to justify it. My distrust is not irrational, but it may be more extreme than it should be.
I see people are listing fears. I have a surprising fear of drowning. It sounds horrible. This has not actually prevented me from water fun and sports, at least when I was younger and less averse to risk. I dream of earthquakes and tsumanis with distressing regularity (though not recently).
